The Batman (2022)

The Batman I grew up with was the cartoony version from the ‘50s and ‘60s, with Bob Kane’s name all over it and filled with gimmicky villains, which led inevitably to the Batman TV show starring Adam West. At the time (approximately age 11) I hated that show for revealing that this cartoony version was a joke. In the ‘70s, DC comics creators tried to evoke the original Batman I never knew—the vengeance-driven orphaned wraith of the night whose name was uttered with the definite article, the Batman—but I was never convinced by it until the Frank Miller version in the ‘80s. Obviously I wasn’t the only one impressed with Batman: The Dark Knight Returns, as this dark knight Batman took hold, swelled up, and led a charge into the movies, where Tim Burton had the first crack at it, Christopher Nolan made a trilogy out of it, and earlier this year came The Batman from director and cowriter Matt Reeves (Cloverfield, Let Me In, a couple of Planet of the Apes pictures in the 2010s). This mighty epic Batman is only five minutes short of three hours, though a 12-minute credit roll at the end cuts into the length a little. We’ve had Michael Keaton in the role, Val Kilmer, George Clooney, Christian Bale, Ben Affleck, and many more, and now we have Robert Pattinson (Twilight, The Childhood of a Leader, The Lighthouse, etc.), who somehow reminds us that maybe Adam West was the best idea in the first place. That TV show looks better all the time—I’m not 11 anymore and can enjoy the joke. Also, I keep hearing that some of the animated versions from the ’90s are the best Batmans. I should check them out.

Anyway, look, this version of the same old dark Batman story is fine, dotting i’s and crossing t’s as we get all the familiar elements rejiggered slightly: Bruce Wayne the orphan, his faithful servant and father figure Alfred, a police origin story for Commissioner Gordon, plus the Catwoman, the Riddler, and pretty sure that’s the Joker they’re teasing at the end. Which reminds me, like the 2019 Joker, The Batman basically wallows operatically in Batman tropes, with a particular fascination about Thomas Wayne, Bruce’s super-rich biological father that Bruce sees assassinated one way or another (it’s not a tragic stickup in this version and there’s some stuff new to me about his mother). The Batman is long, but clips along respectably. Pattinson seems more like a Robin than a Batman—a bit young when the mask comes off, looking maybe 24 years old? He was about 34 when the movie was made but it’s a young 34. He’s not burdened with the voice effects of Bale in the Nolan movies, thankfully. How was he supposed to make his voice do that anyway? As always for me, the costumes place it well beyond any believability. For the kind of impressive outdoors athletic stunts we see here, for example, a cape is obviously not just a hindrance but positively a danger to safety. The Batmobile makes an appearance—it’s reminiscent of the TV show with the rear jet propulsion but then reminiscent (to the point of homage?) of the spectacular chase scenes in The Dark Knight from 2008, still the best dark Batman movie of all. I like the treatment of the Catwoman (Zoe Kravitz) here and Paul Dano as the Riddler is as amazing as the notices have said, though we have seen this giggling madman shtick from him before and, truthfully, the Riddler is a shabby foe generally with his dumbass riddles. In short, The Batman has virtually no surprises, but it is so competent as a big-ticket movie—Michael Mann is another obvious inspiration—that people are likely to be looking at it in the holiday season for many years to come. May as well give in to it sooner rather than later.